Dec 13, 2009

Who Else Wants to Know the Truth to 'Can My Marriage Be Saved?'

If you are one of those whose marriage is on the rocks, you might be asking yourself "Can I save my marriage?" There are numerous reasons why marriages fail. If you are facing such a terrible situation right now, the following are some beneficial tips for you.

The first thing that you need to do is to assess your marriage honestly. You have to know if there is anything left worth saving. If your answer is no, then you simply have to move on. On the other hand, if you still feel that you love and care for your spouse, then you should try your best to save the marriage.

Next, you must find out what is your role in causing the break down of your marriage. This is not about pushing the blame to each other. Instead, it is about learning from past mistakes and make an effort to change the bad attitude and behaviors. If you really want to save your marriage, then you must change your attitude and behavior that have contributed to the break up.

One thing for sure that you can save your marriage is when you can honestly commit to changing your bad habits. By doing so, you are already halfway there to saving your marriage. The next thing that you must take note is that you cannot force your spouse to love you or to be willing to work on your relationship. It is either they will or they will not. Hence, when starting to save your marriage, you should ask them where are they standing. If they really have no interest in saving your marriage, then you simply have to end the relationship and move on.

However, if both of you have a honest and open talk and both of you agree to work out on something to save your marriage, then you should try your best to salvage this relationship. I would advise both of you to approach a marriage counselor as an objective third party can help both of you to see things that both of you can't. In addition, trying to resolve the issue in the marriage by yourself can be difficult as both of you have different opinions and conflicts can arise. Therefore, a marriage counselor can serve to help both of you cool down and listen to each other's true feelings towards saving the marriage.

Nonetheless, I would like to give you a piece of advice: Not all marriage counselor are created equal. You have to bear in mind that some marriage counselor are better than others. It is essential that both you and your partner find one that both of you are comfortable with. If you're not, find another one. In addition, you have to be careful with counselor that seems to want to force both of you back together. Remember that a marriage cannot be saved if both parties no long have much in common and they just cause each other, and themselves pain. Hence, you and your partner should work out with your counselor on a honest and clear thinking on whether the marriage is worth saving or not.

If you ever asked the question "Can I save my marriage?" My answer to you will definitely be "Maybe". You have to know that it cannot be done only by you. It takes two hands to clap and hence both you and your partner must work together if you want save the marriage. If you partner still have feelings for you and would want to work on the relationship with you, then that is good news and you stand a very good chance to save your marriage. However, if your partner simply do not want to resolve the relationship problem anymore and cannot resist themselves to keep blaming you for your fault, then you really have to just give up and move on.

There are many reasons why couples encounter a broken marriage. But there are also many reasons to reconcile a marriage. If you and your partner can find the reasons to reconcile a marriage, then I am pretty sure that both of you still have feelings for each other and you should try all your best to save your marriage. Remember, a marriage is about two persons with totally different background and personality traits coming together and form an alliance to look after each other for the rest of the life!

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